RELICS
      a tale of political correctness, social engineering and nicking things from the gift shop...
        
proposal for a comedy series  by Andrew Barclay, Tom Barnes & Spike Breakwell
characters I episodes I spoof museum web site I about us     

Would you be prepared to rewrite history, just to cut out the embarrassing bits? Would you like to see your local museum turned into a brand new Tesco? Would you like to see more exhibitions featuring Lindsay Lohan? If you can't answer 'yes' or 'no' to any of these questions, or if you just don't give a toss, then welcome to our world...

RELICS is the story of one museum's fight against indifference, interference and ineptitude. And lots of other things beginning with the letter 'i'. And as if this wasn't enough, even the staff don't seem to agree on much:

   “I’m an historian. It’s my job to get bogged down in details.”                                                                    
      (Dr T Barnes, Museum Director) 

   “I’m chair of the leisure services committee on the council. Sod the details; let’s make history sexy!”                     
      (Cllr A Barclay)

   “Sod the details…and the museum, frankly. Just give me sexy history teachers. And lots of them, please.”                 
      (S Breakwell, Museum Education Officer)

And so begins the epic - if slightly pointless - battle for the Soul of History. With the occasional knob gag.

Will the staff ever manage to turn the museum’s fortunes around? Will Councillor Barclay ever say anything without referring to his Blackberry? Will Spike ever find his ‘lucky biro’…?

                                                     characters I episodes I spoof museum web site I about us